Life's Little Check Points

This morning I had to share some very meaningful words my younger brother, Hayden Fuss (I suggest you Google him now, because in 5 years your will see him written up in the New York Times or Wall Street Journal), recently wrote about our special needs brother Grant and the ways of life. Grant is Hayden's twin brother, and unexpected blessing to our family. It's funny how sometimes the most unexpected moments are the ones that hit home the most. 

It's no coincidence that these moments seem to hit us out of left field, for I truly believe that if we could see them coming they wouldn't have the impact as if we were prepared for them. Be grateful for the surprises in life, even the ones that seem ugly on the outside and challenge yourself to find the deeper meaning.

With that being said, these words from my younger brother were so powerful and so unexpected, that I needed to share them with the world. We all fall privy to never truly expressing ourselves. It is a very bizarre yet incredible feeling, as an older sister, to hear your younger brother share such wise words. I think this might be a dose of the joys that come with being a parent....congrats Mom and Dad you did well! ​

Words from Hayden Fuss: "Life is a funny thing. I'm fascinated by how each event dictates the next, a very simple cliche we all accepted very early in life. But to me it's how these events look in retrospect, in the big picture, that is so overwhelmingly incredible.

When my parents found out Grant was special needs, it was a tumultuous and tragic time for them. In short, they had to change their lives. They chose to move to the beach in North Carolina, where Grant could be given up as a ward of the state and receive the complex care he required. It would allow my family to start anew. The people of their small Pennsylvania hometown thought they had gone crazy because of his ailments.

It was there was my father found success and fishing, my mother found friends and tennis, and my sister and I had sun soaked childhoods filled with lots of mistakes that helped us grow. I found skateboarding and my best friends. I played lacrosse which took me to Florida for one hell of a year. I was introduced to science and met brilliant people who inspired me to think. Because of them I've had some academic success and gotten to experience amazing cities like Raleigh and Boston. But really it's all because of Grant. Maybe things would have gone differently, but regardless, Grant happened and then so did all of that.
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Time, like distance, can have such different meaning at different scales. What is a war and chaos at the microscale between your body's immune system and a virus, is harmonious healing at the macroscale (there are countless other examples...) And what is tragedy for a month or a year, is the best thing that ever happened in terms of a lifetime. I'm not saying I wanted Grant to be disabled, I'd give the world to share a beer with him and talk, but that event appeared to be chaos when really it was harmony, or I guess it's really a bit of both. They are indistinguishable.
We forget how much each second matters, how each changes our life. Moments, like musical notes, are insignificant and meaningless by themselves. But together, they play a beautiful song, with the transition from each moment just as important as the moments themselves."